Hello, It's Your Friend Ice Cream Calling

Today is Day 5 of the Whole30ish Challenge. I say "ish" because I'm not following Whole30 but my sister and a few friends are so I'm along for the ride with them. I'm sticking with what I know works for me which is mostly paleo with some high quality dairy (Organic, pastured heavy cream in my coffee/grass-fed cheese or high quality hard cheese on a burger or in my chicken stew) and organic 70% dark chocolate.

Today was a struggle. Weekends are hard for me to stay on task. I am pretty busy during the week but when the weekend comes it's time for a reward for all that hard work! A little rest, relaxation, DVR and ice cream. I'm an ice cream connoisseur. I love the stuff and when I cheat indulge, you better believe it's gonna involve ice cream. The more I journey down this path of wellness, the more I figure out what's not worth it. But ice cream, yeah, totally worth it.

I got done with a work thing early today. An hour and a half early. That meant I would either wait to take the class I was planning on taking at my gym or just go and do a workout on my own. I was tired and unmotivated. My husband was taking my oldest to an away football game. That meant, youngest in bed at 7:30 and a house all to myself. I started thinking about the couch, my DVR, and ice cream. But, thankfully, I remembered the conversation I had with my small group earlier this morning about self-control (I was at least good about looking ahead and seeing what stumbling blocks lay before me!) I prayed for these. God said, "Call someone for help and accountability!" So I called the Hubs and said, "tell me to go to the gym." He did. So I said I would, and I did.

I got to the locker room. I weighed myself. No change. Which didn't surprise me since I've eaten a ton of sweet potatoes and some paleo granola (post coming soon!) to stave off the sweet cravings. But I'm still disappointed. I laid face flat on one of the benches and reasoned with the voice that said, "just go get some ice cream and forget it. Don't eat dinner. Just eat ice cream. It will even out."

Well forget you, ice-cream-lovin', tryin'-to-make-me-cheat voice. I went to a work meeting this morning and said, "no" to one of the tastiest looking muffins I've ever seen. I'm not going to give in to you! I will make it through the 30 days with NO CHEATING! Then, with structure and plan in place, I will have my beloved. . . maybe this, or this local goodness, or maybe even this. So I friggin' worked out (after stretching and rolling around on the floor for 30 minutes trying to work up the energy/gumption/enthusiasm to do work!), went home, ate chicken stew and had some more homemade sweet potato fries with almond butter and it was dang good.

Please know, I believe in having food you enjoy. I believe in having cheat indulgence days. Life is too short and food is too yummy. But I have struggled the past 5+ years of my life to not have an indulgence day every day. And now, I'm digging myself out of that hole. I'm doing the Whole30ish Challenge to get back on track. I may have to get back on track more often than I want, but I can do it. I will. I don't want food to be a creature comfort or something I depend on to unwind. I need God to fill that void. I want food to fuel me, nourish me, and be an enjoyable part of my life not in control of my life.